“No Travel” Tales 8: Exercise

It’s usually at this point in the year that we’re inundated with ads telling us to “get beach body ready”, a rightfully criticised slogan that seems to have only just disappeared in response to lockdown.  “Get isolation body ready” doesn’t quite have the same ring to it, with people unable to show off their newly…

“No Travel” Tales #7: The Supermarket

It seems that I’m not alone in finding supermarkets a thrilling substitution for cancelled séjours abroad. Along with an ever-growing bank of dinner photos, my WhatsApp chats are filled with accounts of recent excursions to the shops – discussions cover the atmosphere (a toss-up between calm and frantic), bargain purchases and the rarity of chatting…

“No Travel” Tales #6: Another Walk

Where walks were once a means to an end – a form of transport to another more exciting destination – they are now an appreciated activity in themselves, one of the few we’re allowed to enjoy. Speed-walking has therefore become a rare sight as we no longer have the desire to rush home, exhausted by…

“No Travel” Tales #5: The Birthday

The once-yearly celebration isn’t quite as exciting as pre-lockdown days, victim to social distancing guidelines and the perpetual unawareness of time. At first, the notion of an isolation birthday seems rather gloomy as you metamorphose from a social butterfly into a lone wolf. Yet there’s a lot to be said for this anniversary, a welcome…

“No Travel” Tales #4: The Bathroom

The bathroom has rather lost its USP in lockdown since incessant hand washing is a norm elsewhere in the house and unkempt appearances are now in vogue. The room has instead transformed into a work of conceptual art, left in the same state as pre-lockdown days – a kindred spirit to Tracey Emin’s installations.  Beauty…

“No Travel” Tales #3: The Food Delivery

Days have seemingly merged into one, with the prefix no longer necessary – FriDay conjures up aromas of a greasy fry-up, SaturDay describes our couch potato lifestyle, and SunDay signals anytime there’s cloudless weather. Yet a new day has entered lockdown lingo: Delivery Day. DeliDay is akin to the feeling of Santa delivering the goods…

“No Travel” Tales #2: The Walk

Walks have become a precious activity in lockdown, the one government-authorised respite from total isolation. Fresh air has that ability to detach you from a wired brain and distract you from a newfound ever-twitching eyelid - an indication, no doubt, of excessive screen time. Being glued to your phone is a risky act in the…